Krishnamurthy says "The moment one's by oneself, it begins. Any desire for its continuaunce, any disappointment if it does not continue does not exist. IT is simply there whether one wants it or not. It's beyond all reason and thought"
I miss my parents. and slowly all those days all those times of togetherness are fleeting in front of my eyes. I wish i had some spectacular memories to come flashing by. All that comes are simple straight memories - of anger, of fighting, of laughter, of being caught, of daily life. Those Sunday evenings, when my mother used to spend time pressing my clothed - she wanted to save that money. Not knowing the financial distress that we were going through, i used to refuse any help to my mother as i find the press-wallah right in front of my house.
My father - the idealistic man with his set of principles. Lot of poeple ridiculed him, some liked him. But he never let that bother him. The only thing that used to bother him was that we used to get bothered about such comments.
.... I wish to write more, but am flowing though too many too fast thoughts....
Krishnamurthy mentions his comment ( at the start of the blog) about conssciousness, for me its more of a depression. That's somewhere close to where i am now. - A void. It is that small place between here and there. And i am there.
To rely back on Krishnamurthy again "The pressure continues and the strain is at the base of the head and it's painful"
Ref: Krishnamurthy's notebook