Thursday, July 07, 2005

Conflict Management

It's been a long day at office.

I'd been away on the wonderful training for the whole day. And the organization had had some defaulter's list circulated. Of course, once the list was out, none of the projects wanted to be among the list. So majority of the seven hundred odd projects hit on the application developed and maintained by my team to upload their data.

Beyond straining the existing infrastructure, thus spurious activity spiked the helpdesk enquiry. Calls list grew longer and so did the tempers start to run wild. On hindsight, it looks interesting to note how people behave to service desks, when you are in the middle of it all it ain't that funny.

Especially when you realize how education has no relation with cultural, moral and ethical values of a person.

Late in the evening, Apoorva came to me "There's been a problem"

Me: "What?"

"Someone called up on the phone. He spoke to me as though the helpdesk was his servant. His PM/PL is not there and they say their data is missing. And not only that they have a very arrogant tone and they started advising me on how a helpdesk should be." The complaints were endless.

Two minutes later, the project team was in our location. I was surprised. It was like a local tamil movie. A bunch of dark heavyset guys walk into my wing looking around like goons. All they were missing were some hockey sticks. They look for Apoorva. And i stand next to Apoorva. They want to speak to him in the meeting room in private. I am in too. Then they tell half of their team "Thanks machi... naange paathukkurom (Thanks dude - we will manage it ourselves ) and the rest leave.

We get in the room. It took me by surprise that the entire team had come up not to get any isue resolved, but because , apparently , my guy had used the word 'Hell' while speaking to them and they wanted to settle scores. Now these are software engineers and leaders earning handsomely and who are expected to educated highly. And they are here, 8 guys to settle scored with one guy because this guy had used one word while speaking to them and they wanted him to apologize.

I had and will never have any doubt that Apoorva did not use that word. He is not capable of that. But he might have cut the conversation abruptly by keeping the phone down. He would do that, if you cross the limit. Anyways..

Apologize my foot - was the first thing that came into my mind. Rationale took over immedietely. What would have been the purpose? That i could come out as a hero? that i would prove a point? To whom? To four guys who think that it is more important for them to get an apology for using a word than anything else in the world?

What was really surprising was their attitude. Assuming that such a conversation including the word had taken place also, such a reaction as what they had had would have been expected only from uneducated people who had no values in life. It is only them who could have misplaced morals and ethic system as these guys.

I forced myself to smile and had nothing to say, when i realized that the whole conversation was going nowhere. Profusely apologizing, if their egos had been hurt, showed them the door. indicating that we all had better use of our time. After few hmms and hos, raised voices and faked accentual english statements, couple of them got my hints.

They say, you should never wrestle with pigs. You get dirty. The pigs also get dirty, but then, they love it.


  1. Hahahhahahha hahhhahahh ahahah ahahahha hahahahha, ahahhahahahah

    I am reallly sorry buddy, i could'nt stop laughing at this. Niether at Apoorva, nor at you.. at the whole situation! I am just imagining 8 guys walking into your floor, looking for you... !

    You missed one point here, Education also does'nt have any relation with Common Sense!

    You talk about Ethics and Morals,
    people here use 4 letter words(not hell) in their official conversations, as if it adds some value. Standing in the centre of the floor, (you know how TCO is), calling out somebody using such words.. and have a laugh on that??????

    Worser, i've seen, names being scrached on doors in TCO, you know those adolescent crazyness.. come on! I am just wishing, hoping, praying, its not one of those who sit in front of the computer.

    Worser, this guy calls up one of my friends (ofcourse, a girl) middle of the night and talks some rubbish. She got panic and did'nt knew what to do and took leave for two days. the third day she comes in, this guys walks upto her and says, sorry about that, i get disoriented sometimes, it was one of those phases (phases, MPD or what?).. pls do not tell this anybody. This is no out of college punk, this guy has got around 5 yrs of exp in the industry.

    Worser, one of the very senior most members(he is VP now) in the company suddenly calls me one day, and asks me about some discussion and the some word that i seemed to have used. I really couldn'nt recollect what he was talking about. Come on man, you are far far far above my cadre in the organizant, and pls dont tell me you are gonna spend hrs for this one word. Its not any bad word. I realized rather saw how much discussion has been happened at that level about one question i raised. They spend hrs together analysing what i could have meant in that question. Rather it was pretty straight forward. I did try to defend.. but later on realized it was not worth. He was not making any sense in his arguments. He took one hour talking about same thing again and again and again. Finally i asked what is it that he wanted me to do. He said, nothing, actually ... blah blah... i said "I'am very sorry about what happened, if that's what you are looking for". He kept quite. I walked out saying "Thanks". Came back, sent a mail to everybody who were involved, the big names you never want to know (ignorance is bliss) saying, i apologize, if this had hurt your egos so badly, though it could have been taken in a better sense. I am sorry. I still dont know, how they derived such a meaning that they were talking about.What has education, status, brilliance, position everthing done to his values, morals and ethics beyond all common sense.

    But cant believe the whole team walked up to you to for this...!

    Values, Ethics, Morals...

    We indians, our foundation is our culture. The thousands of years of morals and values that we are holding to. The thousands of years of ethics and morals that's been taught to us by mouth, by our mother, father, grandparents, friends, brothers, sisters. These are the people who can neither live leave it nor hold it. The generation that is struggling between the speed of technology and the subtless of the values. Because they dont understand both.

    Wat say?

  2. Sorry guys. But I came out of the corporate loop a year back. Planned to stay for half a year but ended up spending just the intially One and a Half year.

    That's why I am sticking to the "written word" - at least I would have the satifaction of remaining - a. unattached to any individual conversations; b. secured within the 'newspaper' organisation, which would take up the blame - Press Act and all.

    About the education. Hey me, Welcome to the Real World. Don't take me to be Morpheus. But barbarity and inhumanity goes hand-in-hand with civilization.

    These things donn the garb of fragile civility and boom! at the wrongest moment - it shows its spots.

    Also it is not MPD but the dormant MCPs (Male Chauvinistic Pigs) inside these... goons... that feel offended for no apparent reason.

    Education has no visible relation to anything. That is just a pretty accessory to adorn your CV.

    Believe me. Even the "most educated" can turn out to be the surprise barbarians.

    These hooligans are also pseudo machos. The ones which would find it "egoboosting" to scare someone else.

    I have met a lot of them in this short life of mine. And believe me - they are aplenty out there. That is why I am scared to meet anyone new.

    The girls like to be docile (and I am talking about myself too) because they are the "refined" creatures. (read the sarcasm in that too).

    Then again the girls are also a little scared of "what would people say".

    The guys somehow zero in on this universal trait in girls and - hit where it hurts the most - the vanity and pride.

    Flexing muscles have nothing to do with being a graduate or a PhD. And sitting timid has nothing to do with "emancipation" and "liberation" and "freedom of space".

    For all the words can do - there is a new culture evolving.

    But you know what is frustrating and funny? That none of us - old, new, yet to bes - want to acknowledge it.

  3. Ah-mazing.

    Agnostia, the power your written expresiveness is absolutely applaudable. It explodes on your face with no apologies. Lots of raw energy - lots of power, lots of strength.

    Packaged with an unstoppable flow and an eloquence i am almost envious of :)

    What say, ams?

    With admiration (lots of it)

  4. I think i should go learn english before i could start writing something..

    Awesome!!... i better dont say anything else...

  5. Hey ams and me, that's hurtful.

    You could come up with something better than this.

    And i am just lenting out some heat. There is nothing more to it than that. ams don't be such a fool to think that you need to learn English -

    you know Dr Seuss wrote Cat in the Hat with just about 100 - 150 odd words.

    And that is considered to be a classic.

    so i am just a person with flashy words.

    Nothing more

  6. Hey lady, easier.. it was all complements... from both of us... straight from the heart...

    smile lady :)... feel happy about complements... accept them... it enriches your senses, your feelings and life... be open to complements as you are to critics...

    What i meant by learning english... was not just about words, but about the expression.... language is not just the vacobulary, its about expression... that's exactly what we are awed about in you... the expression.........

    Be Happy :)... say a hearty thanks to any complement... dont regret for being complemented...... dont get humiliated...

    Hmm.. lots of advice is'nt it??


  7. Oh yeah - the enlightened older wiser ones with the great opinion.
    Thankyou, for the advice and the compliment.

    You might want to check out the latest entries in my blogs too.

    Well about language it is right. Because we can express using language - we call it a means of communication.

    One of these days i would post about how language is not the be all of communication - sometimes it makes communicating all the more harder.

    And hey ams how is USA treating you?